Love Stories
by Shadow Crystal Mage
Summary: Love is patient; it is kind. It bears all things, believes all, hopes all, endures all. Love never ends. Terrible things are done for it. For it will men mutilate themselves and murder rivals. For love will even a peaceful man go to war. An Anthology.
1. Love Stories

A/N: Negima is love. And there is more love than just Konoka and Setsuna…

...

Love Stories

by Shadow Crystal Mage

Disclaimer: I do not own Negima, the bible, or the concept of love. Please don't sue me.

...

For Arika so loved her world, she gave up the only thing she had left: herself. She cast it before the teeth of the wolves, except calling these beings wolves would be an insult to wolves. She cast it before the men who said they ruled the world, a fragile shield to protect the little one, to protect her people.

For years, she lay in darkness, only to see the light of the sky one last time, before she was cast into the final gloom. And then…

"I'm here to save you, you idiot."

…an angel appeared…

"But… why?"

"You really aren't going to get it unless I spell it out for you, are you, you damn sheltered princess! Why am I doing this?-! Gawd, I'm doing it **because I love you**! Why the hell else?-!-!"

Heaven apparently had very loose rules on decorum. But that was all right. She'd take him.

...

Tsukuyomi smiled, and nearly had an orgasm. "Hello, Setsuna-sempai…"

She licked her blade in anticipation, and it was like she could already taste Setsuna's beautiful, beautiful blood staining its length…

"Tsukuyomi," Setsuna said, managing to sound exasperated despite how they were about to fight to the dearly death. "What did sensei always tell you about licking the edge?"

"Owf, righf," Tsukuyomi said. "Wellf, thif wilf suref makef eatingf difficultf…"

Setsuna sighed, and with a long-suffering gesture tossed her a medicated menthol. "You still can't take care of yourself, can you?"

Tsukuyomi just smiled. "Thatf'sf whatf Setsunaf-sempaif isf forf," she said awkwardly.

They dueled.

...

Evangeline stared down at the broken body of boya, his still-warm blood on her hands, his slowly cooling body resting against hers. Behind her, the rest of 3-A huddled, most of their Pactios dead without their magister. Setsuna futilely struggled to stand despite the bloodloss and pain from her stumps where her wings once were, even as Konoka frantically did what she could without her Artifact, struggling because of he pregnancy. Before them, the demons waited on the other side of the rapidly dying wind barrier, his last spell.

"…_master…I'm keeping my promise… please… protect them_…"

"Stupid boya…" she whispered. "You were always too soft-hearted to really be my disciple…"

She bent down and bit, sipping at the now-motionless blood still charged with a little power. Enough. Just enough.

The curse broke.

Dark Evangel rose once more… and went to war.

It was what he would have wanted.

...

"_I__n the entirety of these two long years, not a day has passed in which I did not think of you!" Her tear-stained face glared up at him. "Well? Is there something wrong with that?-!__"_

"_No. Not a thing."_

Godel sighed, a wistful smile on his face. One hand reached up as if to caress Arika's face, then sadly let it drop. Wiping the tears from his face, he shut off the recording and secured it. It helped, doing what he did, where he did, to remind himself of why he was in this den of monsters. Her peace made it all worth it.

Still, there were times he wished, childishly, pettily, that _he_ had been the one who had given it to her…

...

Chao Lingshen stared at the small clock-like device in her hands. So small a thing, to change all time.

She turned to the stone platform before her, where the small, childlike girl with golden hair lay, face eternally set in a expression of thwarted peace and eternal sadness. And a touch, just a touch, of desperate hope. Blood still stained her hands, even after all these decades, and the head of a wooden doll was clasped to her chest, beneath a wooden stake made from the remains of a wizard's staff. Bandages where still wrapped around it near the head.

"Eva-sama…" the little girl said, resting a hand on the stone in which the corpse lay. "I'll find a way. You'll be with him… I promise."

The puppet's head blinked. "You know girl, it's because of Springfields making promises we're here where we are…"

Chao smiled. "We always came through, didn't we?"

"Badly," the head said.

"Zero-mama…" Chao pouted.

The puppet's expression didn't soften– how could it?– but the look in her eye changed. "Bring her back."

Chao bent over and kissed the puppet on the forehead. "I will. For you."

...

"Oh, tell me more about yourself," Paio said, pouring some wine for herself and leaning forward in rapt interest. "Your skin is so delicate and soft. Do you use some kind of special treatment?"

The seamstress, _hem hem,_ across the table tried not to sigh. While she was used to men talking to her breasts… she'd never had one who did so _literally_.

...

"I'm sorry I've been neglecting you," Yue said on bended knee, staring upwards. "It's just… well, I've been away, and busy, and I was sort of overwhelmed by all the things happening to me. But that's all over now. I'm back. I'm here for you. I'll never leave you like that again…" she leaned forward, her lips meeting in a kiss…

Nodoka sweatdropped. "Um, Yue-chan, can't you just pick a juice-box from the vending machine and be done with it?"

...

"Hey…"

That was all the warning Nodoka got as Haruna suddenly kissed her on the cheek. The librarian from hell blushed, slapping a hand to her cheek in embarrassment as Haruna smiled down at her. "P-Paru! W-what are you doing?"

Haruna smiled wider. "I hereby declared today 'randomly kiss people I care about' day!"

"H-Haruna!" Nodoka cried, mortified.

Haruna just laughed and kissed her other cheek. Nodoka's blush deepened as she instinctively slapped her other hand to it, making her look like that 'Home Alone' kid. "Silly Nodoka. Now, where's Yue-chan?"

...

**- ****End for 02/14/2011**

...

A/N: Maybe make this a yearly thing or something.

Just couldn't help myself at the end there. The crack will out!

Please review, C&C welcome.

Until next time, this is Shadow, signing off.


	2. More Love Stories

A/N: Not just Negima now. I'm branching to other series. Happy Singles Awareness Depression Day!

...

More Love Stories

by Shadow Crystal Mage

Disclaimer: I do not own Negima, Fate/Stay Night, My Little Pony, Nanoha, The World God Only Knows (IT BE AWESOME, READ IT!), Puella Magi Madoka Magica (HOMURA-SAMA!), Escaflowne, Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei, Tora-Dora!, the Bible (IT BE AWESOME, READ IT TOO!), or the concept of love. Please don't sue me.

Read _**Kaleid Liner Prisma Illya 2Wei!, **_chapter 17! They're canon together, baby!

...

_**Never**_

Asuna never asked who Negi had feelings for. Not when she fell asleep. Not when she woke up in a new world. Not when she, Eva, Zazie, Chachamaru and Negi became involved. Not the first time they made love. Not when they got married. Not during their long, long life.

She loved him. He loved her. That was all that mattered.

...

_**Realta Nua**_

_To stand ,ever waiting_

The sky she stood beneath was eternally blue and clear. Around her were endless beautiful fields, flowers blooming all year, never marred by storm of snow. She stood patiently, watching the distant horizon. She could hear the fairies behind her, voices raised in laughter, song or lovemaking, testing her resolve. They never entered her sight, yet she was aware of them. Arturua remained resolute, even as what should have been the Elysium fields took on the spect of Asphodel.

_To strive, ever-seeking…_

He roamed the world, always dreaming of her smile. Across the land, whispers rose of the silent stranger with haunted eyes. Suspicion grew, but he ignored it, never ceasing his journey. His path would sometimes cross with Tohsaka, and for her he would rest a night, lying in each others arms as they both remembered their first.

"I'm still rooting for you both…"

His hair faded, his skin burned, and one day he looked in the mirror and realized the name of the Servant who had mocked him so long ago. By then, the irony was too faded to matter. And then, one day…

"Shirou…!"

"Arturia…"

Paradise…

...

_**Pure**_

Keima dreaded the day Elsie ever developed a gap in her heart. He knew it was coming. Sooner or later, conflict would always arrive at the main character's doorstep, striking too close to home. That was how it always happened (in games). He did not want to have to conquer his little sister.

Elsie was happy. Her brother was the greatest of gods. She wondered what her sister would think of Kami-nii-sama. They'd probably both agree Elsie was a useless devil. She accepted that. After all, they were so awesome nothing Elsie did could compare.

She loved them anyway.

...

_**Pony Sutra**_

_Dear Princess Celestia._

_Today, we learned the importance of reading the manual all the way to the end with your very special somepony. Apparently, the warnings are there for a **reason**. Also, it's always best to know someone who can give first aid. _

_Signed, Applejack._

...

_**Worship**_

Homura readied the cake, one Mami had bemusedly recommended. A shiny red apple from a reluctant Kyoko lay beside it. The Puella Magi lit some incense and placed it next to them on the makeshift shrine. Last came the bag of the chocolate Homura had painstakingly made in the kitchen and wrapped in checkered pink and white paper. She clapped twice, and bowed her head.

When she looked up, both appale and cake were missing a precise wedge. The chocolates were nowhere to be found.

A month later, Homura found a bag of cookies wrapped in grey paper…

...

_**Invisible**_

It was really unfair, Hitomi sometimes thought, that she could see Gaea. It was an eternal reminder of what and who she had lost. Some nihts she stared at it, wistfully but happily recalling past days. Other times she couldn't bear the sight of it, bitterly wondering why she had left. Worst had been the night when, bathed in its light, she had stared at her breadknife until dawn. There had been no visions, no mysterious omens, no Van's voice calling her name.

Time had passed, and she had moved on, slowly, painfully, bitterly, wistfully, and finally. She'd tentatively begun dating, an experiment that left her feeling out of touch. Her heart hadn't been broken. It was still whole and complete, and in many ways this was worse, there was nothing to heal. She persevered, making friends and from among them taking boyfriends, who all inevitably went back to being friends again. For a rather memorable year living with her cousin Tenou Haruka, she dated girls, which was an equally unsuccessful enterprise.

Time passed again. Her brother grew up, married, and suddenly she was an aunt. She hadn't expected it so soon. There was nothing magical about the child or her birth as Hitomi knew the term. There were no omens, no visions, nothing. And yet, the world changed. The world seemed realer now, capable of wonders every bit as much as Gaea had been. And she could still be part of it.

And now, years later, Gaea no longer taunted her so, even if it was as unfaded as ever. Her husband and son helped her mother in the kitchen as Hitomi comforted her brother. For nearly a week, her niece had vanished from the face of the earth, and no one had any idea why. Police searched and suspected foul play. Rumors flew. And Hitomi, graying if still unlined, could only wonder if this had what things had been like when she had disappeared, in another life.

Then the doors had opened, and the prodigal daughter had walked in, none the worse for wear. There had been joy, and confusion, and tears, and questions, and police, and lies. There had been no way the girl could get lost in the lands around the town she'd grown up in even if a fall down a ravine had happened. And so when the police had left, pacified if not satisfied, family had done the questioning.

And Hitomi's niece had smiled and, to Hitomi's eyes, started and the window at Gaea and said, "King Van and Queen Merle send their love, auntie."

The world became more wonderful.

...

_**Decadent Habits (Hey, It's Obligatory At This Point!)**_

"_I can't live without you…"_

It was, taken by itself, possibly a _very_ romantic statement. And thus Illya von Einzebren considered it _totally_ unfair that the person saying it to her was in no way, at all, a possible romantic prospect. Even Miyu would have been better.

Er, not that she felt anything like _that_ for the other Magical Girl. No, not at all. Because everyone knew that the relationships between Magical Girls was completely allegorical of friendship, and was completely platonic and nonromantic in any way! Most especially if Magical Girls were best friends! Because Magical Girls were _totally_ about straight, platonic relationships between girls. Especially BEST friends!

Illya girl-fully ignored the snickering from the Nanoha fandom and moved on.

"_Even if you add up the miracles…"_

So there couldn't _possibly_ be any romantic reason for why her heartbeat thumped louder in her chest and sweat beaded on her hands and forehead whenever she had to feed Kuro her prana. Nope, none at all. It was just embarrassment, mortification, fear of being discovered and people getting the COMPLETELY SICK AND WRONG idea, dread of same, confusion, anger, and possibly indigestion. Nope, nothing romantic about any of those at all. It was just glands getting messed up, that's all.

"_I'm just barely here…"_

She definitely didn't cling to Kuro's arms life they were the only lifelines she had in a raging storm. Why would she? And if she moaned, it was because she wanted to remind Kuro she needed air soon. That was it, not her reason! Definitely not! Definitely not because she was enjoying herself or anything. Not at all! After all, Kuro tried to kill her when they first met! She was definitely not doing this out of any sort of… of incestuous, Sapphic impulse!

No, definitely not!

…

_DEFINITELY **NOT**!_

Besides… it was because of her Kuro was here now. Because at the end of the day, Illya was Kuro's big sister. It said so on the household's ranking chart. And as big sister, she had to take care of Kuro. She had to take responsibility. She would _not_ let her little sister return to nothing! And if the meant having to– COMPLETELY AGAINST HER WILL AND SHE DEFINITELY WASN'T ENJOYING IT, NO MATTER IF SHE SOMETIMES MOANED, WE'VE ALREADY BEEN OVER THIS!– sometimes play tonsil tennis with Kuro to feed her prana, then as big sister, she had to do just that (Illya resolutely ignored Darkenning's entire literary Dramatis Personae).

Because they were sisters, damn it, and she loved her!

…

Explaining why they were naked and covered in… well, each other might be a bit more difficult to justify, though.

...

_**Stalker**_

At the edge of life, in the presence of Death, Itoshiki Nozomu paused and, with instincts carried through his existence, looked over his shoulder.

"AHH!" he exclaimed, only half-surprised. "You were there?-!"

Matoi smiled. "Always…"

Deep love, _jiiiiiiiiiii…_

...

_**Superstition**_

"Minorin… why are you rubbing Ryuuji's tuxedo on my head?"

"For luck on your wedding, of course! After all, you are still the Palmtop Tiger of Happiness!"

"MINORIN!"

...

_**All Star Nanoha**_

Little Girls. Chance Meeting. Starlight Breaker. Happy End.

...

**- End for 02/14/2012**

...

A/N: Escaflowne needs more love. And one day, I _**REALLY**_ need to get around to a Sailor Moon/Escaflowne crossover where Hitomi is Sailor Gaea…

And for those who don't like the Fate end of Realta Nua… you have no taste and should just die! Honestly, why bother trying to explain why it's a good end to you people. What, would you _rather_ there's no chance they ever meet again in canon?

Please review, C&C welcome.

Until next time, this is Shadow, signing off. See you again next year!

…

FOR ANOTHER INSTALLMENT OF THIS ANTHOLOGY! I'll post in another story before then…


	3. Still More Love Stories

A/N: third year running! THIS fic, at least, will always be on schedule!

...

Still More Love Stories

by Shadow Crystal Mage

Disclaimer: I do not own Candy Boy, Aki Sora, The Wheel of Time, Haiyore! Nyarko-san, To Aru Kagaku no Railgun, Negima, Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei, the URAE series, Bubblegum Crisis 2040, Omamori Himari, the Bible (IT BE AWESOME, READ IT TOO!), or the concept of love. Please don't sue me.

...

_**Innocence**_

She still had them. The first, from when he was four, was a painstakingly, precisely made thing, a labour in crayon and construction paper. She remembered him toiling over it, the crayon held tight in his little fist as he painstakingly carved out the words. The resulting letters had been bold and thick, and had been correctly spelled even if it went into the border of the card a little.

The childish script read, "Happy Valentines Day Nekane, Love Negi."

She had more like it, the quality of word and art increasing with every new one. The next year had included glitter, the year after that, macaroni. The next one, the first after… _that_… had promised her he would always be there to protect her, and had included a cute, lopsided picture of a brave magister Negi protecting his princess Nekane. She wept when she saw that.

A year later, he discovered Hallmark cards. She remembered the selfish twinge in her chest at seeing it, so clean and precise and manufactured, without the touches of him that had come before. But he'd written to say he loved her, and he was busy with his studies. She got the same the year after that.

And then he was gone, gone to a distant land to be like his father, and she had little by which to remember him by.

Months passed. And then…

Nekane stared at the box of chocolate, the bouquet of flowers, and lastly at the card. It was hand-made, painted with an enormous tree, under which a crude drawing of Negi holding a heart stood. For all his skills with magic diagrams, he still couldn't draw that well. It rad, "I miss you. Wish you were here. Love, Negi."

He'd written some strangely metered eastern poem inside, about her, and more pictures of the girls in his class, especially his roommates. As she stared at them, she felt a small, very small, jealous twinge. How many of these girls had gotten cards from him too?

Still, she couldn't help but cry a little. Her little brother still wasn't so grown up as she'd feared after all.

...

_**Prompts to the Autumn Sky**_

Unexpected. "Sora-kun…"

Surprise. "Aki? But… you left…"

Tenderness. "I did… but I never said I wouldn't come back…"

Tears. "Aki!"

Ecstasy. "Sora… my Sora…"

Eventually. "Do you…?"

Determination. "I do."

Repetition. "And do you…?"

Fulfillment. "I do."

Destiny. "I now pronounce you man and wife."

Forbidden. "Aki?"

Love. "Sora!"

...

_**Riding Upon The Winds Of Time**_

Sometimes, he walked the road alone, just him, his horse if he had one, and the wind. The flute gave him bed some nights, and if he didn't, then his arms did. Even years later, there was still rebuilding to be done. He worked in the north, in Malkier and Shienar and the rest of the Borderlands. They were a border no more. There was nothing to be a border _to_.

He worked in the east, in Cairhien and Mayenne and the Three-fold Land. Just because _toh_ had been met did not mean they had to leave if they didn't want to. He played, and struggled to tell stories and wondered if someday the Aiel would sing again.

He worked in the south, in boiling heat and fish, and even back in Far Madding. Without allies, the city seemed more forlorn now. They had not signed his peace. He supposed it was a bit petty not to invite them, but still. The sword remembers the fire. He is not fond of it.

He worked west, in the islands of the Sea Folk and the lands of the Seanchan. He saw and itched, but did nothing. He was dead. There was nothing to be done. Perhaps next time, when all this came back again…

He walked the roads just him and the wind, but not always. Sometimes, Min walked with him, smiling impishly, giggling over the froth Fortuona must be making at not having her Doomseer. Sometimes Aviendha walked with him, walking slowly and a bit painfully, the wretch that was once Graendal in tow just in sight. Sometimes, Elayne walked with him briefly. And sometimes, very, very rarely, they were all with him, and there was nothing but him, them, the road and the wind. And Graendal, but she didn't count.

He could never choose. They never asked him to. After all, how did one choose between three sunrises?

...

_**Crawling**_ _**With A Smile**_

It is said her kind cause madness in those that see them… that their true forms were abnormal, unspeakable, blasphemous, ominous, chaotic, unholy and not very nice to look at.

But… some things, like the bestness of Earth En-ter-tain-ment in the universe, went beyond shape.

A tentacle stroked the image, the appendage a monstrous, horrible thing from the darkest nightmares of the cosmos. _Yasaka Mahiro… _

Somewhere deep inside, a maiden's heart went _doki doki._

...

_**Only My Railguns**_

People thought the Misaka imouto were identical. Cookie-cutter duplicates of one another, all the same, bound by the Radio Noise hive mind, with no true wills of their own.

Mikoto Misaka was disabused of this notion when five imouto came up to her, and asked her to settle a dispute between two of them. One, apparently, had developed the habit of teasing the other too much, and the others had become concerned. The guilty Misaka imouto in question had been blandly obstinate, while the victim had been blandly downtrodden.

"Why me?" she'd asked. "Can't you settle this yourselves?"

The one who'd explained, a Misaka who wore a single stud earring on her left ear, just said, "We tried, Misaka explained sheepishly. 18093 will not stop teasing 15430. It has begun adversely affecting the hive mind. We require a resolution."

Misaka, annoyed, had given in and given 18093 a stern talking to and, when it appeared she was being less than contrite, made the very stern promise that if she teased her sister again, Misaka herself would kick her ass. Now go apologize to your sister and be nice to her, _or else_.

As she watched them go, she found herself mildly exasperated. They were such children. But, it seemed, they were _her_ children. And the strange thing was, they seemed to think so too.

They began coming to her after that. One asked her to take her to a hero show. Another asked her how to cook. Two wanted her to resolve which of them owned a Gekota doll they'd found in the trash. One, a very small one, had dragged Accelerator over to her and had them apologize to each other. She still wasn't sure what that was about. One night, when the city's schools had shut down because of an imminent storm, she arrived in her room to find four imoutos and an exasperated Kuroko, the former asking in their bland way if they could sleep there. And once, in a very, very awkward conversation, an imouto had come to ask her advice if it was okay to sleep with a sister because, "it wasn't like they could get each other pregnant or anything, Misaki mumbled".

Misaki owed them nothing anymore. She'd done what she could, faced Accelerator himself, defied the very city.

She helped them anyway. She was mother and sister to them. It was what one did for your children.

...

_**Cargo Ship**_

When she came back from what Leon had grinningly called Knightsaber Nudie Island— which he'd promptly been smacked by Priss for— Mackie had been waiting. Nene slowed as she saw him, eyeing him nervously. The places on his arms where tendrils had erupted were smooth and unmarked. His face was the same as it had always been, with no strange veins or flickers of uncanny madness lurking. He was just… him. The way his eyes lit up when he saw her, how he began to smile, his lips beginning to shape her name.

"Nene!" he cried, and there was pure emotion in his voice. It was hard to believe he was a boomer.

So she didn't.

"Mackie!" she greeted back, beginning to run towards him.

He was Mackie, whole and entire. So what if he wasn't made the same as her? Men were already from Mars. Robo-Mars made no difference.

Now, a distant part of her thought as his warm, oh so warm, soft, gentle arms held her as if he never intended to let go, she just had to get on Sylia's good side. She looked the possessive sister type…

...

_**All Star Candy Boy**_

Twin Sisters. Longing Looks. Tender Smiles. Always Together.

...

_**Meta-Star-Crossed Lovers**_

It shouldn't have worked out between them. They were from two different series, both over now. One was from a fighting-shounen in the guise of a harem comedy, the other was from a mindscrew series that often did biting social satire and lampshade hanging of common genre conventions. All they had in common was the same publisher, and some episodes done by Studio SHAFT. Their characterizations had little in common, and in canon they didn't explicitly swing that way.

But for some reason, they kept running into each other. When Overmaster was expending the worlding of _Unequally Rational and Emotional, _her series was chosen to be in the background. They didn't meet at first, not until the dodgeball chapter, and even then there wasn't time to socialized in the middle of playing dodgeball. But then the love potion episode happened, and suddenly they found themselves in close proximity to each other. They had to make the stalking dynamic work, to make it fit with the story.

And then there'd been the character development, character development, and the lengthy crisis crossover with the big name epic crossover fic series, which led to more character development, character development. The tsundere had been overworked, appearing as two characters, complicated by both the lengthy chapters and the long writing periods in between.

And suddenly, without being quite sure how, in the midst of it all they found themselves working opposite each other as romantic leads in a brief segment in that famous harem anthology abut Yue. And in another one. And another one.

And then those lemon scenes had happened…

"How did we end up here?" Chisame asked wonderingly as they lay back in the backstory of the 2814 series.

Matoi shrugged, slipping her fingers between the other girl's hand as they waited for chapters to be written, squeezing the magical girl hacker's hand. "He's being meta."

Chisame smiled, and squeezed back. Their One True Pairing sat back and waited. They are content.

...

_**A Cat Person**_

Himari moaned in pleasure, arching her back at the feel of what Yuuto's fingers were doing to her. "Oh, master, that feel so _gooood_!"

Yuuto's sighed, but he didn't stop moving the brush through Himari's hair. "Stop saying things that can be misunderstood."

She just giggled, then moaned again as she leaned into his strokes.

Cat and cat lover closed their eyes. All was right with the world.

...

_**Decadent Habits (yes, another one)**_

"Hey, onee-sama," Kuroko said she opened the door and slipped into the room, most of her attention on her cellphone's screen. "Sorry I'm late. I was just WHAT THE HELL?-!-?-!-?-!"

At _least_ a dozen identical, blank-faced, tired faces looked up at her from where they were sprawled on the floor and, Mikoto saw, _both_ beds. Some still had on bits of school uniform and goggles.

Only onee-sama had frozen in shock and surprise, the rest going back to the… _things… _the wet, sexy, quivering _things…_ they'd been doing. "Onee-sama, how could you!" Kuroko cried dramatically even as she hastily locked the door behind her. "Why didn't you wait for me?-!-?-!"

"Misaka-onee-sama still doesn't swing that way, Misaka said," one of the Misaka imouto said.

"This is just Misaka masturbation, Misaka said blandly," another Misaka imouto said blandly.

"Misaka-onee-sama is teaching us sisterly love, Misaka said decadently," a third Misaka imouto said decadently.

"Wah!" Kuroko cried. "Onee-sama, how could you…!"

"You said that already," another Misaka imouto. It was amazing how conversational they could be while doing… this and that… and _ooooh_, that!

"Kuroko…" Misaka croaked.

Kuroko teleported next to her, pushing aside a tangle of three Misaka imouto. "What is it onee-samaaaAAAAAAA!"

What? Kuroko didn't annoy her _that_ much…

...

**- To be continued...**

...

A/N: I ship Tsunetsuki Matoi X Hasegawa Chisame. Deal with it.

The rest of Ala Iridia are also posting Valentines day snippets. Check out Overmaster and Darkenning's profiles pages for more. And remember, no mentioning Decadent Habits to anyone inconvenient, 'kay? : p

Please review, C&C welcome.

Until next time, this is Shadow, signing off.


	4. DUMB Love Stories

A/N: Four years and still going strong!

….

_**DUMB**_ Love Stories

by Shadow Crystal Mage

Disclaimer: Now invoking parody as protected speech like the big time does!

….

_**Conquered**_

As Katsuragi Keima sat alone on the roof of the school, game for once completely ignored in his back, staring blankly at the stars barely visible in the glare of the school festival's concert lighting, he reflected that conquest was a two-way street. The heroines who liked him tended to say in his mind longer. Their shine made him want to shine for them, to be as ideal as they were.

Only the Real would make such a crappy game so full of bugs as to make that a flaw. And it seemed to work both ways too. Why else would he hurt when she did? Yes, such a crappy game. He really should switch to something else.

The game unit continued to lie unheeded as below, at the concert, Chihiro sang.

….

_**Duty**_

"Shiina-san, may I speak with you?" Chachamaru said.

Sakurako blinked. "Er, sure Chachamaru-chan. Only, can we make it quick? I have a date with Satomi-chan after class."

Chachamaru nodded agreeably. "It is on that subject I wished to speak to you about," Chachamaru said, pulling out some squares from her pocket.

Sakurako blinked. "Are those… cue cards?"

"Yes," Chachamaru said apologetically. "I'm sorry, but I'm not used to doing this. Please bear with me."

"Um, okay…"

Chachamaru made a credible attempt at coughing. "If you hurt her, if you ever cause her any sort of unhappiness, I will hunt you down and kick your ass," she said. Her words were very stilted and she was obviously reading from the card.

For a moment, Sakurako was silent. Then she smiled and nodded. "Okay Chachamaru-chan, I understand."

"Thank you," Chachamaru said, sounding relieved. "I apologize for the threats, but it appears to be traditional."

"I understand," Sakurako said. "You really love your mother, don't you?"

Chachamau blinked at her like she'd just said the sky was blue.

….

_**My Waifu**_

Between seasons Tsuu and 3, which was being delayed a little because all the actors had other work lined up and the still-evil Hatte Saburo was busy concentrating on the official heroes and making Kamen Rider versus Kamen Rider movies, Hiroko, Kozkoz and Malsheena took the small Akibarangers shrine and carefully put it in a box. They managed to sneak it inside the theater while Malsheena distracted the ushers.

Sitting with the three figures on her lap facing the screen, Hiroyo fulfilled their promise to see the Aoi-tan movie together.

After all, it was a Super Sentai tradition that the fallen get one last parting moment with the girl they love. And Luna would probably enjoy the movie.

Until the third season came and somehow brought them back, it was the best she could do.

….

_**Loving Requests**_

Illya stared at the large box of pudding on her desk. And the one on top of that. And the one on top of that, and the ones under the desk too. More boxes of pudding were piled on the bed… and around the bed… and most free spots of floor… and there were a dozen more boxes out on the balcony under a tarp. She turned and opened the closet. Piled on top of neatly folded clothes and under neatly hung ones, more boxes of pudding lay.

"Kuro," she said flatly. "Is this your subtle way of asking if you can have a lot of prana?"

Kuro grinned and Illya jerked as her sister gave her a peck on the cheek. "No, it's my unsubtle Valentine's Day chocolate for you," she said brightly. Then she put her hands on either side of Illya's face and gently caressed their lips together. "That's how I ask for prana," she said gently.

Illya twitched, but the pudding cups were gone by White Day.

….

_**A Bit Overdone**_

Charming and Snow had developed a rather blasé view of magic curses. Turned into stone? True Love's Kiss. Lost your voice? True Love's Kiss. Random sex-change? True Love's Kiss. Get turned into cat? True Love's Kiss. Elongated nose? True Love's Kiss. Cursed hangnail? True Love's Kiss. It had become quite a popular and common cure across the kingdom, and was making a lot of witches, old crones, hags, warlocks, and other wannabes give up in disgust and take up pie-baking or serial murders.

Regina and Emma weren't sure how to feel about Henry being equally curative on both of them.

….

_**An Oath To Keep With A Final Breath**_

Leo, as far as anyone could recall, was the first person in over three thousand years to marry a goddess. Oh, people had done stuff with goddesses before. The children of Demeter, Athena, Aphrodite, Hecate, Iris, and all the other children of goddess of both sides were more than proof of that. Given how close the birthdays and ages of many were, you had to wonder whether they were going around in multiple bodies, having multiple affairs and carrying multiple children at a time. It was a slightly creepy thought.

It hadn't been an official quest. The moment the war with the giants had finished, he had started work, practically while Jason and Percy had been wrangling promises and renegotiated conditions from the gods. He distinctly remembered building a return circuit while the gods had kept shifting between Greek and Roman, arguing with each other and even themselves. He had to hear about the one-god brawl that had been Ares/Mars second-hand, even though he'd almost gotten stepped on. He had worked ceaselessly, ignoring the uneasy beginnings of both camps coming together as Percy and Jason had shakily gotten them to start getting along.

Leo's rescue of her from Ogygia had been daring, dangerous, dramatic and had cost her another dining table. And a fountain. He had flown in alone of the rebuilt Festus, bigger, better and now with de-icing capability and Archimedes Sphere technology, finding his way through the twisted paths gods had laid with the crystal from her cave and Odysseus' astrolabe. When she'd come running out of her cave to find out what all the noise was about, she had topped dead in her tracks. The only words that had gotten out of her mouth were an incredulous, "You again?-!"

She'd looked absolutely adorable with her mouth hanging open like a goldfish.

Leo had smiled, devil-may care. "I promised, didn't I?"

He'd still been surprised by their second kiss.

All through their flight out, weaving their way through the broken path he and Festus had torn, she had held him tightly, as if afraid he would disappear if she let go. For his part, he'd tied them together as securely as he could devise, and he could devise a _lot_. He wasn't going to lose her to some random bump or freak wind. She stared at him as if she could believe he was there, asking him over and over again if this was a dream. Even after they landed, even after she introduced her to everyone and she and Percy had a rather awkward reunion, she didn't seem to believe it until she woke up the next morning to still find herself no longer on her island.

And their story began.

They didn't get happily ever after. They'd didn't ride happily into the sunset to the soulful strains of orchestra music, and then roll the credits. There had been the wrath of gods, angry she had been freed even though they themselves had promised it would be so. There had been the wrath of demigods, of sons and daughters rallying to their friend to put their foot down. There had been Leo and Calypso's Auto Shop, with added stew and vegetables. There had been chaos, and strife, and at some point Egyptian wizards and a zombie apocalypse.

They had not gotten happily ever after. They had gotten better. They'd gotten a life.

….

_**All Star Ala Rubra**_

Exiled Queen. Idiot Hero. Daring Rescue. Boy Wizard.

….

_**Certain Siblings of Railgun**_

One day, Misaka Imouto 19090 decided, they'd have tea with their little sisters. Nunotaba Shinobu had taken the little ones away to be finished, to finally lose their poisonous nature and not be reliant on their lollipops. That was all right. The Sisters trusted Shinobu almost as much as big sister and Kamijou Touma, and 19090 more than most. She had given 19090 her heart. She had given 8912 her first, the Sisters' first, precious, beautiful view of the sky. She had given them the taste of tea. Milk tea, so strange, unlike the taste Testament had given her. It was held inside her, inside all of them, like 1 posing so childishly, in disregard of basic gun safety. She was dead now, but she was still a part of them too.

One day, she thought even as the information slipped away from her into the wider sea of the Radio Noise network, one day they'd share milk tea with their new sisters Janie and Febri, and their brave, loving onee-sama, and the woman who was the closest thing they had to a mother.

_And steal their ultra-rare pink Gekota!_ Last Order declared.

And thus began one of the many mental civil wars over those who thought this was a good idea and those who felt this was not proper older sister behavior. In the end, they all decided to just mooch off their older sister for it.

After all, it was what a loving little sister did…

….

_**The Old Story**_

It was, Arsene considered philosophically, the same old story. In the flurry of battle between Phantom Thief and Great Detective, hearts were stolen. It was inevitable when one side set out to take things and the other side sought to take them back. Sometimes, you didn't notice they'd gotten their hands on it until it was gone.

They weren't supposed to do it. _Love was a destroyer_, it was whispered from one Phantom Thief to another, _a poison. There can be no love between thief and detective._ _They will never accept you for what you are_. _A free spirit, a refined soul, a connoisseur of taste. Always, you will only be a breaker of their laws. It was always the way between Detectives and Thieves. _

And yet, equally whispered, in furtive voices and guilty thoughts, was the story of Holmes and Adler. The greatest detective of all and The Woman, who must surely have been his equal.

And so sometimes, those who meet ill by moonlight under the deceitful clouds would stay their hands, and think of themselves not as they who take and they who stand guard. Sometimes, by merest chance, they see the souls in the eyes of the enemy, and remember that before there are Toys, there are hearts.

Sherlock Sherringford had stolen her heart the same way she did everything else, with energetic and vapid enthusiasm.

Now the dance _truly_ began.

….

_**Better To Rule…**_

Homura had once heard that if you loved something, set it free.

She had done so, but she herself had remained trapped. She was still within the eternal maze, only now with no purpose, no goal, no shining star to steer by. Nothing to do but count the days until she and Madoka had been reunited.

Homura had once heard that if you loved something, set it free. If it came back, it was yours.

Now she was never going to let go. Not until Madoka set _her_ free… so she could come back too.

….

_**Demoted to Extra**_

"Hey Yuuno," Arf asked, her tail wagging adorably as her ears quivered. "What do you think Fate-chan and the others are doing right now?"

"Oh, probably more yuri shenanigans," Yuuno said absently.

Arf sighed. "I hope they visit eventually. It's been four years, and I still haven't met this Vivio girl." She pouted. "It's not fair! I'm a cute loli now, why don't _I _get my own manga?"

Yuuno patted the naked loli next to him on the bed. "I'm sure she's not cute as you."

After all, demoted people need something to do. After years cooped up together, things were bound to happen.

….

**- To be continued…**

….

A/N: See you again next year!

Please review, C&C welcome.

Until next time, this is Shadow, signing off.


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